8.07.2005
I've gotten a couple of emails about this, so I just wanted to say I'm not updating this blog anymore. Thanks for reading.
1.26.2005
I'm lazy, but I'm alive. I might be changing blogging/journal/rambling spots again, soon. Yes, I'm a whore for the latest net trends. 33 inches of snow and it's still falling. Fucking New England. Super Bowl: t-minus 11 days.
12.30.2004
When I read that Jerry Orbach died on CNN, I immediately recognized his face, and I never watched Law & Order. Then I remembered he was Baby’s father in one of my favorite movies, Dirty Dancing. RIP, Jerry Orbach.
It just needs to be said that I hate people for a variety of reasons right now.
1. I hate the way when you’re driving in Boston and you want to switch lanes, putting your blinker on is akin to slapping a sign on your car that says “Please speed up and tailgate, making it impossible for me to get over. Thank you.” So of course, you have to be a devious asshole and wait until the perfect moment before switching lanes, with nothing more than a flip of your blinker as you’re already sliding in.
2. The way retail people seem to think that they don’t get paid for handling returns after Christmas. It’s your job, asshole, so save your mumbling comments for your mother and give me my money back. A special shout out to Old Navy, who decided in a stroke of corporate brilliance not to issue sales credit slips immediately after merchandise is returned, instead they send you a gift card for your credit amount by carrier pigeons sent from Tunisia. This takes them 2 weeks.
3. People who feel the need to be combative about the stupidest shit. Verizon vs. Sprint vs. Cingular, PC vs. Mac, Sony vs. Nintendo, etc. etc. The truth is, I could care less which brand you prefer and why. That also goes for the people who think it’s cute to constantly be a devil’s advocate. There’s a reason why you usually have no friends, asswagon.
4. Our stingy-ass government. Yes, the US gives the most money in aid to other countries, but when you compare it as a percentage of our GNP, we’re dead last in the world. It’s fucking ridiculous that we can spend billions of dollars on an ill-conceived war, but we can’t crack open the national wallet to send money to people who have had their entire villages swept away until the UN calls us cheap.
I think that about covers it for the time being.
I need a new television series to get into, it seems like there’s always shit on television. Any recommendations?
It just needs to be said that I hate people for a variety of reasons right now.
1. I hate the way when you’re driving in Boston and you want to switch lanes, putting your blinker on is akin to slapping a sign on your car that says “Please speed up and tailgate, making it impossible for me to get over. Thank you.” So of course, you have to be a devious asshole and wait until the perfect moment before switching lanes, with nothing more than a flip of your blinker as you’re already sliding in.
2. The way retail people seem to think that they don’t get paid for handling returns after Christmas. It’s your job, asshole, so save your mumbling comments for your mother and give me my money back. A special shout out to Old Navy, who decided in a stroke of corporate brilliance not to issue sales credit slips immediately after merchandise is returned, instead they send you a gift card for your credit amount by carrier pigeons sent from Tunisia. This takes them 2 weeks.
3. People who feel the need to be combative about the stupidest shit. Verizon vs. Sprint vs. Cingular, PC vs. Mac, Sony vs. Nintendo, etc. etc. The truth is, I could care less which brand you prefer and why. That also goes for the people who think it’s cute to constantly be a devil’s advocate. There’s a reason why you usually have no friends, asswagon.
4. Our stingy-ass government. Yes, the US gives the most money in aid to other countries, but when you compare it as a percentage of our GNP, we’re dead last in the world. It’s fucking ridiculous that we can spend billions of dollars on an ill-conceived war, but we can’t crack open the national wallet to send money to people who have had their entire villages swept away until the UN calls us cheap.
I think that about covers it for the time being.
I need a new television series to get into, it seems like there’s always shit on television. Any recommendations?
12.28.2004
Been awhile since I updated. I wish I had some grand excuse for my absence, like that I was traveling through Europe or something, but it’s more like I was too lazy to compose my thoughts into more than an away message. Besides, it’s a blog, not like I’m the White House Press Secretary.
Christmas was fun. I actually enjoyed the family part of it a lot this year. Usually I’m calculating my possible loot intake, but this year I realized that my family is hilarious and we rule, and the holidays are fun because of them and not because of the fabulous boots I got (well, mostly because of my family). When Dallas and I were little, we used to put on these stupid dances at family gatherings and during special events. It would inevitably be the latest TLC hit and we’d dance and lip synch while everyone watched. We decided to put on a dance this year for Christmas, and uh, yeah, that’ll be the last. It was really funny though. Everyone was dying laughing while Dallas and I ran through our choreography to the classic “All I Want For Christmas Is You” by Mariah Carey. No, there will be no encores. We also played the Lord of the Rings version of Monopoly (yes, we are a geek family) on Christmas Eve and there was much swearing and cheating. So I had a good holiday. Did you?
I went sledding last night with Reggie, Justine and Darius. I dressed like an Eskimo, so for once I was totally warm. It rocked, actually. I love that moment of sheer terror when you pick up that last burst of speed and go careening toward a parked car or something. Really quite fun. Much as I bitched digging my car out of the snow the other day, I’m glad we got some.
Christmas was fun. I actually enjoyed the family part of it a lot this year. Usually I’m calculating my possible loot intake, but this year I realized that my family is hilarious and we rule, and the holidays are fun because of them and not because of the fabulous boots I got (well, mostly because of my family). When Dallas and I were little, we used to put on these stupid dances at family gatherings and during special events. It would inevitably be the latest TLC hit and we’d dance and lip synch while everyone watched. We decided to put on a dance this year for Christmas, and uh, yeah, that’ll be the last. It was really funny though. Everyone was dying laughing while Dallas and I ran through our choreography to the classic “All I Want For Christmas Is You” by Mariah Carey. No, there will be no encores. We also played the Lord of the Rings version of Monopoly (yes, we are a geek family) on Christmas Eve and there was much swearing and cheating. So I had a good holiday. Did you?
I went sledding last night with Reggie, Justine and Darius. I dressed like an Eskimo, so for once I was totally warm. It rocked, actually. I love that moment of sheer terror when you pick up that last burst of speed and go careening toward a parked car or something. Really quite fun. Much as I bitched digging my car out of the snow the other day, I’m glad we got some.
12.08.2004
Ha, I got my ticket dismissed today at the clerk magistrate's office. Kiss my ass, officer. Next time you feel the need to ticket someone for failing to stop at a stop sign, put down your donut and make sure they actually didn't stop. I was pleasantly surprised with the whole process. I got a chance to tell my story and someone gave a rat's ass. Usually when you deal with cops, they're never wrong and they don't want to hear shit, and there isn't jack you can do about it. A clerk magistrate is a fabulous invention.
The Red Sox signed former Diamondbacks closer Matt Mantei to a one year $750,000 deal. Need it be said that Theo Epstein is a genius? The major knock on Mantei is his constant state of injured-ness, but when he's healthy, he's nasty. For that price, even if he pitched 3 months, it's totally worth it. Hello, 95mph fastball.
Oh yeah, and New York got Tony Womack and Jaret Wright.
The Red Sox signed former Diamondbacks closer Matt Mantei to a one year $750,000 deal. Need it be said that Theo Epstein is a genius? The major knock on Mantei is his constant state of injured-ness, but when he's healthy, he's nasty. For that price, even if he pitched 3 months, it's totally worth it. Hello, 95mph fastball.
Oh yeah, and New York got Tony Womack and Jaret Wright.
12.03.2004
So, Jason Giambi admitted to using steroids in his released testimony. So did Barry Bonds (“unknowingly.” riiiiight.). In other news, Anna Nicole Smith has admitted to being a dumb whore. The only thing I could think about when I watched the newsflash about it on SportsCenter was this: can we have those 2 homeruns Juicin’ G hit against us in the 2003 ALCS taken back? I like how there’s murmurings that the Yankees will try and void the last 4 years of his contract because he sucks now, under the guise of being outraged and betrayed over his steroid use. When it comes out that Sheffield is also a juicer, I wonder if they’ll try and void his as well? Mm, not likely. Enjoy your PR mess, yankee sluts. As for Barry Bonds and his bad attitude: enjoy the asterisk, asshole.
11.30.2004
I hate after-Thanksgiving sales. Stores always advertise these wondrous prices, only to have like 1 or 2 of the actual item in stock. This disappointment awaits you if you’re stupid enough to wake up at the buttcrack of dawn and sardine your way into Wal-Mart with the rest of the known world. I’m not that dumb, so this year I did what I’ve always wanted: I slept in and then sat on my ass all day long. It’s all about the simple things in life.
I really hope the rumors about Ken Jennings losing this week on Jeopardy are true. I’m so tired of this bastard. It was cool and interesting up until oh, I don’t know, the 40th episode. Now his nightly ball-washings and dipshit smile are getting a bit tedious. You know what would be good television? Watching him get annihilated by some 13-year-old on Teen Jeopardy.
Asshole award: The nice people at Anchor Bay Entertainment, who thought that making the discs in the Xena Season 4 box set overlap with one another would be an ingenious space-saver. Talk about fucking annoying. If you want to get disc 2, you have to pop disc 1 out. If you want disc 4, you have to pop disc 3 out, and so on. Really aggravating. Considering the fact that I paid $52 for the set, there should be no hassle involved in taking the damn DVDs out.
I really hope the rumors about Ken Jennings losing this week on Jeopardy are true. I’m so tired of this bastard. It was cool and interesting up until oh, I don’t know, the 40th episode. Now his nightly ball-washings and dipshit smile are getting a bit tedious. You know what would be good television? Watching him get annihilated by some 13-year-old on Teen Jeopardy.
Asshole award: The nice people at Anchor Bay Entertainment, who thought that making the discs in the Xena Season 4 box set overlap with one another would be an ingenious space-saver. Talk about fucking annoying. If you want to get disc 2, you have to pop disc 1 out. If you want disc 4, you have to pop disc 3 out, and so on. Really aggravating. Considering the fact that I paid $52 for the set, there should be no hassle involved in taking the damn DVDs out.
